Meet Lixin: A Dutch Chinese Adoptee

It's finally time I introduced you guys to someone who I met abroad and who has changed the 'adoption game' for me!

Her name is Lixin, she's a Chinese adoptee, who was raised and studies in the Netherlands!!

Backstory:

I made friends with a lovely group of Dutch people who are also on exchange at my school in Berlin. I was invited to dinner out at a sushi place by a mutual friend who was in their friend group. One of the people in the group had two friends who were visiting him for a few days from the Netherlands. We didn't get to talk a lot because they were sitting on the other side of the table.

We re-located to a Mexican restaurant where they served 4 euro cocktails and I happened to be sitting next to the Dutch girl who was visiting, Lixin. Because we were sitting beside each other, we began talking about school, family and everything included in a introduction conversation. The waiter was handing out our cocktails, passed Lixin's drink to her and asked her if she was Thai because she ordered a Mai Tai. She chuckled and shook her head no. Afterwards, I asked her if she ever got asked, "What type of Asian are you?" because I often experience that and was curious if she could relate. She replied saying that she didn't get that often, but if she did she would just reply that she didn't know [what type of Asian]. I looked her puzzled and asked why she said she didn't know. She stated she was adopted. I broke into a huge smile and excitedly told her I was also adopted! She explained further, saying she was adopted from China and I smiled even wider commenting that I was also adopted from China. I could not believe that I would meet another Chinese adoptee in such a casual way! I was so glad that she ordered a Mai Thai and we both could bond over the fact that we were adopted. We proceeded to share stories of being adopted, educated everyone of the recently-changed One-Child Policy and laughed over the funny coincidence of meeting each other. By the end of the night we were calling each other 'sister' and I had added her to all the Chinese adoption Facebook groups so she could meet other Chinese adoptees online. Lixin's adoption story is a little out of the ordinary because the majority of Chinese adoptees are adopted into the United States and Canada, so t's more uncommon to meet a Chinese adoptee from anywhere else. I am so grateful to have met her and I can't wait to introduce her to you!

Lixin

Lixin was raised by her Father and Mother in a small town in the Netherlands called Hoorn. She lives in Amsterdam and studies physiotherapy. She was adopted from Changde, Hunan Province when she was 1.5 years old. She was found a few days old in a basket in front of a hospital. Before being adopted she lived in an orphanage and later with a foster family who lived on a farm. Lixin is an only child, but feels no large desire for siblings. She is very close to her family, especially on her Mother's side. All her family lives in other parts of the Netherlands and she sees them often because of how small the Netherlands is. She likes to go to music festivals, is really open- minded and LOVES good food. I asked Lixin if she had any advice or insight she'd like to give regarding adoption and she said, "I guess the only advice i can give is my own mindset about my adoption. So my advice will be, don’t dwell on the past or your adoption too long. Take it as it is and be greatful that your biological parents once found the courage to say goodbye to you, whatever the reason may be. Don’t forget where you come from but also enjoy life to the fullest :)"

Lixin and I met again in July when I went to visit family in Amsterdam before I went back to Canada. We met a popular park downtown and she gave me the real Dutch experience by letting me ride on her bike with her. We talked about her busy weekend and her work at a chain Dutch grocery store, Albert Heijn, as she struggled up the hills and I sat on the backseat (sorry Lixin!) We talked for 2.5 hours over dinner about everything: family, adoption, my exchange, sexuality, relationships and everything in between. At the end of the night, we hugged each other goodbye and have stayed in touch since.

I am so grateful to have met Lixin and get a different perspective of what it's like being a Chinese adoptee in another country. The way-of-living in Canada compared to the Netherlands is quite different, so it's fun to imagine what my life would have been like if I had been raised in a European country. Unfortunately, I could not meet her parents, but we agreed that next time it will definitely happen- I can't wait! It's always great for other families with adopted children to talk to other families in the same boat.

Overall, I learned that no matter where I go, in Canada or in Europe, I can still be surprised to run across other Chinese adoptees. I look forward to the many more I will meet while exploring the world.

Thank you to all the patient readers who have been with me for the past two years... it's been too long and I miss blogging. And thank you to all my new readers!! I hope I can give you some insight and create an open platform for you to feel comfortable to ask me questions. I'll continue writing when inspired :) Enjoy fall!